The keys for me to doing a challenge like this are 1) sharing, 2) allowing yourself to catch up, and 3) using a little creative license when you’re stuck — since the point is, after all, to be creative.

So what’s the benefit for writers? It teaches you to always be looking to your surroundings for inspiration. When you do a challenge like this, you have to find the interesting in the mundane, the beautiful in the ordinary things we see every day. Sometimes it’s simply a matter of opening your eyes or peeling them away from your computer screen; other times it’s a matter of changing your perspective.  It forces you to use your imagination, to solve problems, and to tell a tiny story with a single picture (something that is, perhaps, even more beneficial for screenwriters in particular).  Plus it’s super fun, and when you’re stuck in the Doldrums of Act Two, every little bit of fun you can pass off as creative work helps.

And bonus: If you veer toward the sentimental like I do, it’s kind of fun to have these small moments documented throughout the month to look back on.

So I’ll be participating again in February, again using fat mum slim’s handy prompts. If you’re a writer or fancy yourself creative in any way, you should definitely consider it. It’s such an easy creative outlet with nearly everyone’s phone having a camera on it these days, and you’re looking at about one to two minutes of effort a day, if that. If you’ve got an iPhone, you can use instagram to perk up your photos. I have an Android phone, so I use the Camera360 app, which has done a lovely job (though sometimes I do pull out my fancypants camera on days my phone just won’t get me the detail I want).  Here’s the list:

And last but not least, here’s what I ended up for January (click to see at proper size & not all grainy):

Filed under: life, photography, writing ]]> http://elizabethditty.com/2012/01/31/the-janphotoaday-challenge-and-why-photo-challenges-are-good-for-writers/feed/ 1 ditty1013 photoaday2 February Photo A Day Challenge Ditty's January Photo-a-Day Collage http://elizabethditty.com/2011/07/19/a-farewell-to-borders/ http://elizabethditty.com/2011/07/19/a-farewell-to-borders/#comments Tue, 19 Jul 2011 12:04:40 +0000 Elizabeth Ditty http://elizabethditty.com/?p=1303 ]]> I knew last week that Borders could no longer be the refuge it once was for me.  Too much angst and longing now lived inside its walls for me to truly benefit from the calm I always found in its towering shelves of books.  But I still loved it.  And I’d hoped that someday I’d again find more comfort than sadness there.

But that day won’t come now because Borders, within a matter of weeks, will be closing its doors for the last time.  As much as society has heralded the coming of the eReader, analyzed the effects of behemoth Amazon, and discussed the role of the physical book in our increasingly electronic world, it still sends a physically unsettling jolt through me to know that, if I’m in dire need of a book, I won’t be able to duck into my favorite bookstore and pick it up.

Sometimes two days really does seem too long to wait.  And Amazon, as much as I love them and support them with my business, doesn’t have someone to make small talk as you pay for your purchase.  No one comes up to you as you peruse the links and blurbs to ask if you need any help finding what you’re looking for.  Amazon can’t look you in the eyes and smile at you.  Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but in my book that still counts for something.

The thing I loved most about Borders was it gave me a place to go, and then, to be.  How many words did I write within the support of its walls?  I cannot tell you with any greater specificity than, it was a lot.  It was a good place for write-ins, less cramped than local coffee shops, and with the added benefit of inspiration all around you, by way of people as well as the stories that had made it to concrete form via paper and ink and binding.

How many conversations did I have whilst walking the aisles or sitting in the café?  It was one of my favorite places to meet to catch up with people, quiet enough to hear both your thoughts and the voice of whomever you were with, but not so quiet that you felt awkward speaking.  The spirit of the place always felt warm, which made it perfect for both rekindling and deepening friendships, both old and new.

Now, as this place I’ve loved slowly disappears, I must decide how to remember it.  This is what I choose. Borders for me will always be a purveyor of magic.  It was the place I could meet a friend I hadn’t seen in months or even years and discover kinship immediate and deep.  It was the place I learned I could fall in love again, all because a barista made me tea, stole my heart and carried it for a time; and it was the place where I was learning to survive heartbreak when my heart became too heavy for him to bear.  It was the place where I could walk among stories, from the centuries-old to the just-revealed, and steal their strength and wisdom, and where I could trade money for the honor of taking them home with me.  And it was the place where I could and did create stories of my own, enveloped by humanity’s greatest tradition even as I took part in it.  Magic, all of this.

I can take comfort in knowing that this magic will not cease to exist with Borders, but a part of me grieves knowing it will be harder to find.

Hey Ditty,

I wanted to wish you good luck for your shoot tomorrow. I don’t know if that in itself is bad luck, or if “break a leg” only counts for acting and not directing. But whatever, I’m not going to suggest you break your legs, even under the guise of superstition. And anyway, you don’t need luck. Luck is for people who don’t know what they’re doing.

I’m sure you’re having sleepless nights and grumble-belly days thinking about all the things that could go wrong. Oh, that pesky Universe! But here’s the thing. I have no doubt that you’ve planned and scribbled and sketched, and have everything under control, so most likely, almost definitely, everything is going to run smooth as you like, but, let’s not pretend moments don’t sometimes happen. Outside forces you can’t control, or forgetting to carry the 1 in your formula of greatness; sometimes, occasionally, something will go a little outside of the plan. And when it does, there’ll be that crazy beat of panic where you feel like you’ve just swallowed the whole sky.

But say that does happen, you know what? You’ll make it work. Smart, creative people always do. And you’re one of the smartest, most creative people I know. I mean, when do artistic things ever really totally fall apart? Almost never, right? Talented, creative people use those moments, like a frog on a pond getting a leaf blown into his face – just cling on to the leaf and steer it home. You still get where you were headed, it’s just, sometimes you have to take an unexpected detour down a road that’s strewn with only happy accidents. It might be hairy at the time, but if making art is easy, you’re doing it wrong.

I hope that hasn’t put ideas in your head about things going wrong. I sought only to highlight these things to prove how powerless they are to those with the skills to weld them like weapons. And anyway, it’s all going to go great. So, sleep soundly tonight, knowing that you’re Elizabeth Fucking Ditty, and that tomorrow, you’re going to tip some of that magic that lives inside your head out into the world, and that’s all there is to it.

And instead of good luck, I’m going to say – have fun. Among all the stress, rush and panic, try to find moments of enjoyment. Revel in the situation you find yourself in – a situation of your making. Art out of nothing. A situation, people, moments; all out of nothing, because you dreamed it up, and because you made it happen.

And hurry up and get it on Youtube so I can watch it.

–Stuart

In the midst of what is admittedly a bit of a rough season of life (I guess they must come around from time to time), I really can’t properly say how grateful I am for the encouragement and support of all kinds.

To my family & friends helping out this weekend, THANK YOU.

To the people (like Danny Stack, who’s just debuted the final episode of his fun little webseries, Liquid Lunch) who have taken on these sorts of creative challenges and are so generous in sharing what they’ve learned along the way, THANK YOU.

To my friends (like Matt, who writes fiction as well as insightful, humorous and sometimes infuriating things about movies, and Stuart, who writes books and blog posts and various other dark and amusing things) who are always supporting my creative fancies, THANK YOU.

You all are awesome.  Really.

There are a few factors I credit/blame:

• After working my arse off to rewrite my script for Bluecat’s Fellini resubmission, I ended up with a version of it that I knew was, once again, not would I felt it could be.
• Literally the very same evening I submitted that, I had to dive straight into Round 2 of the Cyberspace Open.
• The very next week, I attempted to start looking over another script for a quick polish before the Nicholl deadline.
• My calendar tends to work in mysterious ways, being crammed full of events for about a week and a half straight followed by a completely dead three- or four-week period. Guess which phase it was in during all this.

These elements combined to induce the following behaviors/emotions:

• I began to hate the script I was reading, despite the fact that it’s actually my favorite thing I’ve ever written.
• The idea of going back to the script I submitted for Fellini actually made me feel a little physically ill.
• Because of those two things, I essentially stopped working — I just couldn’t bring myself to do it — instead choosing to watch episode after episode after episode of Sex & the City.  I think I’ve watched four seasons in the past two weeks.
• I began suffering some pretty severe mood swings, going from feeling very happy to extremely low. I’m generally a pretty even-keeled person (the Golden Mean has long been my motto, sometimes infuriatingly so), and it distresses me when I’m not — especially if I can’t pinpoint why.  Which of course does not help matters in the least.

Last week I finally hit a breaking point that can best be envisioned as me shouting to the heavens, “What the hell is going on with me?”

So I did what any normal* person would do. I started tracking my mood and any factors I thought might affect it in a spreadsheet.

As part of that endeavor, because I know I feel crazier when I’m not writing, I challenged myself to write 500 words a day 5 days a week.  They could be on anything at all — blog posts, journal-style pieces, travel memoir, fiction, whatever — but I needed to get back into writing in a pressure-free but consistent way.

In a week I’d written 6,321 words, and on Sunday I suddenly felt compelled to pick up my script again.  I cannot tell you how relieved I was to find I didn’t hate it anymore.  On the contrary, I feel positive about it**, and with maybe an hour of polishing, I’ll still manage to have it ready to submit to Nicholl this week.

And I’m beginning to see some patterns emerge regarding my mood that will help me going forward.  I’ll know more as the weeks pass into a month or two.  The one thing I’ve learned without a doubt, though, is this:  If I neglect to give myself a break, I will break.

This all may seem a little nutty (I’ve never denied my nuttiness and could never hope to), but I’ve found no greater tool for life than self-awareness.  Learning what makes you tick and what knocks you over is integral to creating an atmosphere in which to do your best work and to live your fullest life.  Not everyone needs a spreadsheet to do this (though I’m hoping I’m not the only person in the world who resorts to such methods), but if you, too, ever find yourself floundering, take some time to step back and examine yourself.

This can be kind of a scary thing to do, because it involves acknowledging all your feelings — uncomfortable ones included and perhaps even highlighted — along with your shortcomings.  But in doing so, you get the opportunity to figure out how to work around or even use those things to your advantage in the future.

* “Normal” here can be defined as “extremely Type A to the nth degree.”
** Also of note, Justine Musk wrote an excellent and thematically related post on “moving through the creative gap.” Check it out.

• “V-Day is a money drain…and stupid…”
• “Quite frankly I think the holiday is pointless.”
• “It’s not really the same once one has an established family and passing out valentines to others outside my wife would certainly be seen as questionable behavior.”
• “It just feels so corporate. I think it’s for people who have to be reminded that they love each other.”

Some people lamented the potentially depressing effects on singles:

• “I’ve never been fond of the holiday b/c I’ve never had a date during that time period. However, this year is different, so I’m actually looking forward to it!”
• “At uni I was single & heart broken on a V day & thought: This bites. Seeing the sad side of Valentine’s day must have ruined it for me, because I lost interest in it completely.”
• “Let’s just say I’m feeling very Jessica Biel about Valentine’s Day this year.”

Others are just trying to make the best situation they can out of their circumstances.

• “I’m trying to make my Valentine’s week as ‘happy’ and fun as possible; otherwise it has the potential of being a real downer for me!!! Especially this year!! Not gonna let that happen!!”

My favorite comment, though, was this one, from my friend Meg (@ahrdor):

• My humble opinion (with overly-black&white labels): *because* it’s such a big deal to the masses, if you *didn’t* take that day to (also) show off your loved one, you’re arrogant & lame. Ya know? Those who proclaim, “I don’t need a special day to say I love you” are just being silly. You got a Valentine? Be proud of it. Brag on her/him. Do it on every other day, but geez, really? Not on V-Day? <- I think that’s lame. For the record, I also think a mere dozen roses & restaurant visit is lame, but that’s just me. Some couples adore that & DO show their love that way. More power to ‘em. Home-cooked meal, candles & lots’o'snuggle-like time is where it’s at for me! I’ve always had sucky V-Days & look forward to having one, someday, that kicks ass.

As for my own thoughts, I have a somewhat inexplicable love for the holiday.   I have no spectacular Valentine’s-related romantic triumphs — quite the opposite in fact.  Here’s a sampling from the high/lowlights reel of my life.

• 1993: I get to leave school for several hours and return just in time for the Valentine’s party with shiny new accessories: braces.
• 1997: In junior high, I get my first dozen roses from a boy, and I carry them to all my classes, reveling in being coupled on Valentine’s Day.  (We break up two weeks later.)
• 2001: Eight months into my first serious relationship, I spend the day trying not to expect any surprises because my boyfriend is 1) poor, and 2) away at college.  No surprises greet me whilst in school, but his mother shows up on my doorstep around 9 p.m. with a cellophane balloon.
• 2008: A relationship on the rocks leads to an awkward but, in my eyes, sweet dinner/movie date to an Irish pub with the most fantastic bread pudding and DEFINITELY, MAYBE, which turns out to be surprisingly good.  I end the night feeling hopeful.  I hear nothing for three days and later find out much of that time was spent in the company of another woman.  It becomes my last coupled Valentine’s Day.
• 2010: A man outside a flower shop tasked with getting people into said flower shop hands me the dozen roses he’s supposed to be advertising.  I try to refuse them because I don’t want him to get in trouble, but he insists.  I leave with renewed faith in love and random acts of kindness.

Like Meg, I also hope to someday have a coupled Valentine’s Day that takes my breath away.  But in the meantime, I can’t bring myself to feel bad or angry or resentful on Feb. 14 of every year.  Even when you spin those negative emotions into something potentially fun, like Minneapolis’ Shred the Love Un-Valentine’s Event (H/T to @austinmn), all the negativity seems like a waste of energy.  Why not take that energy and put it toward love?  And the best part is, you get to define what that means.  If I may be so bold, let me present a few ideas:

Volunteer somewhere that needs love. An after-school program, a nursing home, a library, an animal shelter, etc.  There are plenty of needs out there; it’s not hard to find one to fill.

Reflect on what you love, and spend the day celebrating it. Love coffee?  Take the time to truly savor a cup.  Love to cook?  Express it with a special hand-prepared meal.  Love books?  Make a date with a novel.  Love films?  Get thee to a movie theatre, or settle into your sofa with an old favorite.  Love writing?  Sit down and plug away at your current project, and revel in the fact that it’s so simple to engage in something you love.

Define “love” broadly, and express the sentiment to people you love. Friends, family, coworkers, your neighborhood baristas — anybody who makes you smile on a regular basis is eligible.

Don’t forget about yourself. “To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance,” as Oscar Wilde so pithily pointed out.  So, on Valentine’s Day, be a little kinder to yourself, too, in whatever way that means.  Maybe it’s getting in a solid workout or taking a yoga class.  Maybe it’s finally forgiving yourself for that One Big Mistake.  Maybe it’s a mani/pedi or a facial.  Maybe it’s as easy as getting to bed at a decent hour for once.  Whatever it is, you deserve a little kindness, too.

So, as the Lone Unadulterated Lover of Valentine’s Day, that’s my two cents on the matter.  So much in life is affected by how we frame our thoughts, and Feb. 14 strikes me as a great opportunity to refocus on sharing a little compassion toward ourselves and others while rekindling our passion for whom and what we love.  Happy Valentine’s Day, friends!

Kate: Why do you think you are so drawn to the city of London and its European borders?

Ditty: There’s a certain energy to London that I’ve never really felt anywhere else.  As Samuel Johnson said, “When a man is tired of London, he is tired of life; for there is in London all that life can afford.” Admittedly, I haven’t had the opportunity to visit many big cities yet, but London obviously has a very different feel to it than my native Kansas City or even Paris. There’s this wonderful dedication to the arts in London, and in Europe in general, whether it’s by way of the many museums or the gorgeous architecture or London’s fantastic theatre district.  In many ways, a city like London is always changing while still retaining this rich loyalty to its history and culture.  That paradox fascinates me.

Kate: What is one of your favorite experiences you had while you were in London and why?

Ditty: One of the most interesting experiences again relates to the theatre.  I ended up seeing Birdsong twice, which ended up being a fantastic decision because they had four actors out sick for the second performance, including one of the principal actors in the second and third acts.  This afforded me the opportunity to see how different scenes played between different actors, how they were forced to modify some scenes because they were shorthanded, and how the audience reacted differently to various aspects of the show as well as how the actors responded to the audience.  I wrote about it in a little more detail on my blog, but, in short, it was really very educational for me as an artist and entirely fascinating as an observer.

Kate: What is your least favorite?

Ditty: My least favorite was getting lost twice on the way home after having had a particularly nerve-wracked and in some ways mortifying evening.  It was snowing, and I was freezing, and I was exhausted, and I wanted nothing more to crawl into bed and turn off my brain ‘til morning.  Unfortunately, my sense of direction had other ideas, and I ended up taking a wrong turn and having to walk much farther than I should have to a tube station, and then, about 7 minutes from my bed & breakfast in Hammersmith,, I ended up hopping on the wrong bus and managed to find myself back across the river right under Big Ben.  I did eventually make it home, but it was not my finest series of moments, to say the least.

Kate: Could you see yourself making London your permanent home in the future?

Ditty: I don’t know about “permanent home,” but I could certainly see myself spending lengthier amounts of time there.  In a perfect world, I’d have a flat in London, an apartment in Paris, my house in Kansas City, and maybe a beach villa, too.  I draw different things from each place, and I’d love to be able to pick up and go wherever I’m feeling drawn in the moment.  I’d go to London for energy and inspiration; to Paris for beauty, a little existential meditation and creative focus; to the beach for a little R&R; and back home to see family and friends.

The truth is, as much as I love spending time in Europe, and as much as I’d love to do a lot more travelling, I think I’ll always consider Kansas City a sort of “home base.”  I think that’s probably a very “Dorothy” thing to say, but it’s the truth.

Kate: In your opinion, what are some specific qualities that Britain has that the United States lacks?

Ditty: Again, I’d have to point to that respect and loyalty to history, art and culture.  Europe is very proud in a lot of ways because it’s experienced so much.  There’s a great scene in the film EASY VIRTUE where Kristin Scott-Thomas’ character is berating Jessica Biel’s Larita for her suggestion to sell off the family’s land: “Coming from a country no older than the chair you’re sitting in, it seems a very practical solution.”  We do that sort of thing all the time here in the States.  We knock down buildings and build new ones instead of restoring them.  We put a much higher priority on the practical rather than the beautiful.  There are obvious advantages to those ways of thinking — forward progress is a great thing — but you lose a certain respect and appreciation for what’s come before.

Kate: Instead of going to go see major attractions such as Westminster Abbey, etc., what are some lesser known attractions in London that you particularly enjoyed?

Ditty: There’s a really interesting art/science gallery called the Wellcome Collection that’s worth checking out.  It’s sort of a nice break from the more traditional galleries and museums.  I also enjoyed a quick visit to the Old Operating Theatre Museum, where you can see a vast array of historical medical devices and instruments, as well as the operating theatre, which is exactly what it sounds like: a place where doctors could gather to watch an operation.

I’d also highly recommend catching some West End theatre.  You can get very cheap tickets for day-of shows at the TKTS booth in Leicester Square.  I think a lot of people tend to go for the big stage musicals, but the stage plays are really what I’ve enjoyed the most.  The Woman in Black is a fantastically spooky piece, and it plays at the Fortune Theatre.  The Comedy Theatre, which doesn’t necessarily stage comedies but so far in my experience has provided ambitious shows with fantastic actors, has become my favorite theatre, and it’s just around the corner from Leicester Square.  It housed my favorite shows on both trips — namely, La Bête, which transferred to Broadway shortly after I saw it, and Birdsong, which  just ended its run.

Beyond that, there’s also the highly entertaining street theatre in Covent Garden, the various markets in different boroughs, and really simply walking around and immersing yourself in the energy of London.  There’s really no better place to simply people-watch — Trafalgar Square can get particularly interesting sometimes after 10 p.m.  You can also catch red carpet premieres in Leicester Square on a pretty much weekly basis (they had the NARNIA and TRON premieres while I was there), and it’s always kind of neat to see the set-up they create (you can also glimpse the actors if you’re into that sort of thing and are willing to fight the crowds).  They went particularly all-out for NARNIA, transforming the entire square into a sort of winter wonderland, and they had these huge laser-light-show things set up for TRON, which was interesting to see.

Kate: What was one of the weirdest things you experienced on your travels?

Ditty: On my last day in London, I was wandering around my favorite places bidding them adieu, and a guy jogged up to me in Covent Garden.  He immediately started rambling about how he’d seen my magenta tights and thought I looked interesting and that he had a friend who worked in the fashion industry and that I had reminded him of her due to said tights and also my knit hat and coat.  At some point I became fairly certain he was trying to hit on me rather than pickpocket me (it’s often very difficult to tell the difference, I’ve found), but he was saying odd things, likely due to his nerves, such as I had “one playful eye,” which immediately made me wonder if I’d somehow developed a lazy eye since I’d last looked in a mirror, or that I seemed “bouncy.”  He also told me about the novel he was writing — it was his first — which sounded like it would either end up being really quite interesting or really quite terrible.  In the end, he turned out to be a nice enough guy, and he requested a hug “since we’re friends now,” and I gave him one.  He was the first native Brit to hit on me, so, despite it being really quite bizarre, I recall the memory fondly.

Kate: In a nutshell, how would you describe the people of Britain?

Ditty: Well, I can’t really speak for all of Britain, of course, but I do interact with a fair number of non-Londoners on twitter.  To sum them up, I’d have to say that, in general, they are a delightfully witty bunch, often with dry and somewhat acerbic senses of humor but with an undercurrent of real kindness beneath the stiff-upper-lip exterior.  As for London itself, it is truly a melting pot of different cultures, nationalities and personalities; there’s really no way to sum up the people of London other than to say they’re fascinating in their diversity.

Kate: You’ve also been to France, what is your favorite thing about France and why?

Ditty: Imagine your typical, entitled, stressed-out, always-in-a-rush American bustling up to a French person, who is in the midst of sipping the tiniest cup of coffee you’ve ever seen. Before the American can even get out whatever question he or she thinks is So Very Important, the Frenchman delivers a look of utmost disdain, which clearly says, without saying a word, “Chill the fuck out. There is nothing in the world that is more important at this moment than me enjoying this tiny cup of exquisite coffee — certainly not you.”  At which point, if the American is smart, he or she does indeed chill out, find a pastry or a crêpe, have a seat on a bench or at a table outside a café, and look around at all the beauty he or she was missing while busy being busy.  That is my favorite thing about France.

Kate: Would you say that the atmosphere in European countries has a significant influence on your writing? If so, how?

Ditty: Most definitely.  There’s so much beauty and energy in Europe that it’s hard not to find inspiration.  Over the three weeks I spent there this past year, I think I filled an entire moleskine notebook with observations, notions and stories, and those usually take me a good year to fill up.  The access to so much great theatre motivates me as well, and I’m actually in the very beginning stages of planning a short film inspired by a human statue I saw in Trafalgar Square.

Kate: If you could only visit one again, would you choose London or Paris?

Ditty: There is honestly, truly, absolutely no way I can make that choice, and you are a terrible person for even making me consider such a thing.  Both cities are full of meaning for me, and I can’t imagine not getting to visit both of them again multiple times throughout my life.

Kate: What should people keep in mind before traveling abroad?

Ditty: That’s a very broad question, and I think there are a lot of better resources out there for the practical side of things (when to go, what to do, what to see), but I will say this: Consider yourself a guest in someone else’s home when you travel abroad.  Be polite.  Use your manners.  Try not to inconvenience your hosts.  Try everything that’s offered to you, even if you don’t think you’ll like it, because every experience has value.  Engage your hosts when it’s appropriate, and learn everything you can without being a pest.  Don’t be afraid to ask for help, and be grateful when you receive it.  Smile.  Laugh.  And look up (and down).

Kate: What are some examples of how you “dare to be different?”
(Ditty’s Note: This is a running joke in my family ever since my fifth grade teacher told my parents I was “eccentric” and “dared to be different” during a parent-teacher conference.)

Ditty: Ha, well, there are so many examples I could give, but I fear most of them are simply me just being a bit weird rather than me actively daring to be different.  But I’ll try.  One thing that seems a bit unique is that, when I decide to do something, I do everything in my power to actually do it.  Whether it’s writing a script by a certain date or revamping my health & fitness, I seem to have a bizarre level of drive and perseverance, and that’s something I seek to cultivate.

I also do my best these days to be my authentic self, regardless of the expectations of others.  So, in that respect, it’s not that I try particularly to be different; it’s that I embrace the aspects of my personality that don’t necessarily mesh with the typical.

Oh, and I also do things like taking up horseback riding, fencing, going to London alone for my golden birthday, signing up for aerial acrobatics and pottery classes, and spearheading a sisterly helicopter trip.

Kate: What inspires you to write?

Ditty: I like to examine and attempt to explain various aspects of the human condition through storytelling.  I think it’s human nature for everyone to do that in their own way, whether it’s through art, science, politics, philosophy or religion.  For me, it’s always been writing, though I’ve been less aware of it at certain times in my life.

I was once accused of writing to escape, and writing can do that for folks temporarily, but it’s never been that for me.  Writing is a means of understanding, not escaping.  So, to answer your question as properly as I can, I guess it’s really just life that inspires me to write.  Whether it’s an overheard conversation or a weird news story or an amusing encounter or simply a poignant observation that leads to a given story, it’s always a product of the emotional core of life.

I don’t really recycle my real-life experiences as often as I recreate the emotions felt during my experiences.  And because of that, I hope that what I write is emotionally truthful even when it’s obviously a bundle of lies.  As Neil Gaiman so eloquently puts it in A Writer’s Prayer, “Lord, let me be brave, and let me, while I craft my tales, be wise: let me say true things in a voice that is true, and, with the truth in mind, let me write lies.”

Kate’s write-up (complete with unflattering pictures of me + 20 pounds) is here.

1. Read 24 books in 2010. – Done.
2. Read 24 scripts in 2010. – I managed only 12. Not so good.
3. Finish TDPU & submit to contests. – Done, and while I got no Nicholl love at all this year, ‘TIL DEATH PARTS US did make the semi-finals of the BlueCat competition this year, so I’m taking that as a small triumph.
4. ScriptFrenzy 2010. – Done.
5. NaNoWriMo 2010. – Done.
6. Visit a place I’ve never been before (preferably in Europe). – Definitely done! I returned to Paris with my sister, and I visited London twice, once with my sister and once on my own.  I also went to the beach and then to the Smoky Mountains, where my sister and I completed a 5.4-mile, moderately challenging hike (not bad for first timers!) up to Rainbow Falls.
7. Write & film [secret project]. – Well, I didn’t end up writing/filming the secret project I originally had in mind, but I wrote and filmed something else, I think I can count this as done.  As a bonus, I also started a movie podcast with my friend Matt, which isn’t something I’d ever really considered doing, but turned out to be pretty fun.
8. Write an adaptation. – This didn’t make it onto the agenda, sadly.
9. Keep up with FridayFlash/short stories. – I only did 8 true #fridayflash stories this year, and I wrote a few travel/memoir pieces. Not quite the output I had in mind, but I’m relatively pleased with the pieces I did write.
10. Watch 200 movies. – I very nearly made this, with my count currently sitting at 191, not including repeated viewings. This also includes a few seasons of various television shows, so I’m certainly not going to complain about my media intake this year.

I kept one big goal to myself at the beginning of 2010, and that was my health/fitness efforts.  I’ve since posted a little about my journey and made mention of it several times in my #reverb10 posts.  In total this year, I lost about 65 pounds.  I hit my original goal weight, and I’m wearing smaller clothes than I wore in high school.  I’m not quite where I want to be, but I’m close enough that people look at me like I’m crazy when I say that.  In addition to the weight loss success, I also ran my first 5K race on Thanksgiving, tried/survived/came to love hot yoga, and in general got to a fitness level where I can show up grown men at the gym on a fairly regular basis.

Lessons Learned: Honestly, it was a rough year for me creatively speaking.  After churning out story after story in 2008 & 2009, I think maybe my brain just needed to take it at an easier pace.  I also was obviously devoting a lot of time and energy to the whole health/fitness thing.  Contest season put me in a bit of a roller-coaster state of mind, but NaNoWriMo helped get me back on track with my daily writing habit.  After my birthday trip to London, I felt creatively refreshed and ready to get back to work, and I hit the ground running the day after I got back.

I think I’ve covered a lot of what else I’ve learned this year in my #reverb10 posts, so, if you’re interested, here’s a round-up for your perusal.

• Dec. 1: One Word – In which I peg 2010 as Reinvention and predict Manifest for 2011.
• Dec. 2, 5, 6, 7: Writing, Let Go, Make, Community – In which I talk about how I design my life to support my writing, mention that I stopped spending unnecessary and unwarranted emotional energy, try to remember what I made this year (stories, short film, food), and wax poetic about my love for twitter and give a shout out to SparkPeople.
• Dec. 3, 4, 8: Moment, Wonder, Beautifully Different – In which I admit to my ridiculous but needed sobfest brought on by Child’s Pose, discuss the benefits of expanding one’s gaze beyond the ordinary or comfortable, and pinpoint a few ways in which I try to light people up.
• Dec. 9: Party – In which I almost pass out thanks to a corset.
• Dec. 10: Wisdom – In which my friends try and fail to help me figure out how I’ve been wise this year.
• Dec. 11 & 12: 11 Things & Body Integration – In which I name 11 things I want more of in 2011 and talk about the mind-body connection I get through fitness and how it translates to other areas of my life.
• Dec. 13: Action – In which I get on my soapbox and encourage people to do instead of talk.
• Dec. 14 & 15: Appreciate & Five Minutes – In which I talk about our ability to add or subtract joy through small actions and recount in snapshots of words & photos the things I’d most want to remember about 2011.
• Dec. 16 & 17: Friendship & Lesson Learned – In which I encourage everyone to chill out so we can appreciate and learn from one another, and where I talk about how I should leave the scripting for my scripts instead of my life.
• Dec. 18 & 19: Try & Healing – In which I talk about wanting to get back to my habit of trying out-of-the-ordinary things (like fencing, horseback riding, and aerial acrobatics, and where I quickly talk about how hot yoga has helped me with body image distortion.
• Dec. 20: Beyond Avoidance – In which I make excuses for not cleaning my house.
• Dec. 21: Future Self – In which I end up feeling very schizophrenic by writing three letters to/from three different versions of myself.
• Dec. 22, 23, 24: Travel, New Name, Everything’s OK – In which I recount my various trips, create a few personas/aliases that might be fun to use some day, and refuse to tell the story about how I learned that sometimes foolish things are worth doing.
• Dec. 25, 26, 27, 28: Photo, Soul Food, Ordinary Joy, Achieve – In which I repost a photo of myself in a silly hat and talk about why it’s my favorite of the year, link to my post about French pastries, decide I should sit on the sofa & read more often, and tell people to wait for my year-end recap (which just so happens to be this very post!).
• Dec. 29, 30, 31: Defining Moment, Gift, Core Story – In which I talk about my short film screening, the gift of having great friends & receiving grace & kindness from strangers, and stealing my life mantra from ELIZABETHTOWN.

And last but not least, here are my goals for next year.

1. Query TDPU.
2. Query the children’s story/poem/thing I wrote in 2009 (which includes the task of finding something more clever to call it instead of “story/poem/thing” in case publishers do not find humor in me Pippining at them).
3. Finish M. Valentine screenplay.
4. Visit 3 places I’ve never been before.
5. ScriptFrenzy.
6. NaNoWriMo.
7. Write a stage play.
8. See something I’ve written produced in some way, shape or form.
9. Watch 200 films.
10. Bonus: Get & keep house in order.

I think that covers it.  2010 really did end up being a pretty awesome year, and I’ve got a feeling 2011 might be feeling a little competitive. Here’s hoping each and every one of you has found some joy and laughter in 2010 and that you find exponentially more in 2011!

Dec. 29: Defining moment: Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year. (Author: Kathryn Fitzmaurice)

This year feels like it’s been full of defining moments. I covered a lot of them in my Dec. 15 post. One thing I didn’t cover was the actual screening of my short film.  That was one of the more nerve-wracking things I’ve ever done.  E-mailing someone a script to read in the privacy of their own lives is one thing. Watching a group of nearly 20 of your friends, family and acquaintances take in and react to something you’ve created from scratch is something altogether different. Thankfully, everyone either enjoyed the film or did a decent enough job pretending they enjoyed it that I didn’t feel the need to crawl under a rock and die afterwards.  Quite the contrary, once I’d gotten over the emotional hurdle of actually showing the film, it was nice to have had the opportunity to share something with people I care about.

Dec. 30: Gift: This month, gifts and gift-giving can seem inescapable. What’s the most memorable gift, tangible or emotional, you received this year? (Author: Holly Root)

I’ve been blessed time and time again this year, so it’s hard to narrow it down to just one thing.  I’m incredibly grateful for all the people who have taken the time to support me in various endeavors, whether it’s been reading scripts and giving feedback, offering an ear when I needed to vent, or even just providing a distraction when I needed to escape some aspect of my life for a bit. I’ve been amazed by the kindness of strangers over and over again this year, and to those who have been so gracious with my heart and ego, I cannot thank you enough.

Dec. 31: Core story: What central story is at the core of you, and how do you share it with the world? (Bonus: Consider your reflections from this month. Look through them to discover a thread you may not have noticed until today.) (Author: Molly O’Neill)

There’s one word I’ve returned to over and over again over the past several years, as I’ve struggled and striven and failed and succeeded at any number of things.  It’s part of a mantra I’ve stolen from one of my favorite movies, which I refuse to define as a guilty pleasure: ELIZABETHTOWN.

“We are intrepid.  We carry on.”

It’s a word that means “resolutely fearless, bold, courageous.”  It’s a definition that strikes me as a call to refuse to acknowledge fear.  It may be there in the recesses of the mind; it may be trying to work its way to the forefront.  But we can stubbornly refuse it entry into our actions and motivations.

For a long time, I operated out of fear: fear of what people would think, fear of not living up to my own expectations, fear of regret, fear that I wasn’t strong enough to bear whatever trials were to come.

But then I came across a profound statement in the writings of Thich Nhat Hanh.  I don’t remember the exact words, but, in essence, he said that fear is imagining yourself in a set of circumstances that don’t exist. I don’t know about you, but that seems like a poor use of the power of the mind.  I’d rather focus on the here and now, what I have and what I can do to make the most of the present moment.

So, since the discovery of that principle, I’ve tried to make my core story one of being intrepid.  And I’ve got to tell you, it’s really worked out pretty well.  Have a fallen on my face a few times? Of course. But that’s going to happen no matter what.  That’s when the second part of the mantra comes in handy.  You get up, brush off the grit, have a laugh at yourself, and carry on.

Dec. 25: Photo: Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you. (Author: Tracey Clark)

I don’t have a lot of pics of me from this year outside of profile pics, forced family photos (I love you, Mom!) and some random shots my sister took of me in Europe, mostly when I wasn’t looking.  But I do have this one picture, which I love, and which I already shared, but here it is again.  My mom took it during our annual pre-Christmas trip to Crown Center (to shop, eat fudge, and take goofy pictures in front of the Victoria’s Secret windows).

My expression in the photo below says exactly this: “I know this is totally dorky, and I’m a little embarrassed, but it’s also totally fun, so I’m just going to go with it, and you guys are coming along with me for the ride!”

So, here’s what I’d like this picture to represent.

• I love to laugh.
• I like to spread joy whenever I can.
• I choose my actions with a priority on the potential for laughter and/or joy rather than on sparing myself embarrassment or failure.

Dec. 26: Soul Food: What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul? (Author: Elise Marie Collins)

For this prompt, I’ll simply point you to my love letter to French pastries. Can’t say it better than I did there.

Dec. 27: Ordinary Joy: Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year? (Author: Brené Brown)

Sitting on a sofa and reading a book.  I often keep myself in a near-constant state of motion, either physical or mental, so taking an hour to simply sit and disappear into another world is something that feels incredibly indulgent and wonderful.  It’s something I should probably do a lot more often.

Dec. 28: Achieve: What’s the thing you most want to achieve next year? How do you imagine you’ll feel when you get it? Free? Happy? Complete? Blissful? Write that feeling down. Then, brainstorm 10 things you can do, or 10 new thoughts you can think, in order to experience that feeling today. (Author: Tara Sophia Mohr)

I’m going to have to skip this one, as I’ll cover it in detail in my annual Year-End Recap to come later this week.  As for brainstorming what to do or think in order to experience satisfaction today? I like to do something every day to work toward my goals.  It gives me a taste of the satisfaction that comes with finishing, and it spurs me onward.

Dec. 22: Travel: How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt)

• I went jogging on a beach in Florida.
• I went hiking in the Smokies in Tennessee.
• I protected my sister from some creepy dudes in London.
• I ate my weight in pastries in Paris.
• I celebrated my golden birthday on my own in London.

Not bad for a year’s travel.  Next year, as I’ve said, I intend to do more travelling. Definitely to New York.  Probably back to Florida (as that’s what my family does).  Maybe even back to Europe.

Dec. 23: New Name: Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why? (Author: Becca Wilcott)

I’m quite good with my current name, to be honest.  But for the sake of the prompt, let’s say I was pretending to be someone else entirely for a day.  Here are a few options:

• French Tourist: Juliette (Trivia: This is the name I chose in my seventh grade French class.)
• Southern Belle in the Big City: Annie Mae
• Cool British Vixen: Vera
• Adventurous Aussie: Janie

That should do it. And as a bonus, I’ve saved myself some trouble if any of these ladies ever pop up in something I write.

Dec. 24: Everything’s OK: What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead? (Author: Kate Inglis)

Please excuse me being entirely vague here, but there are some stories that simply aren’t meant to be posted for the entire world to see.  What I will say is this: I did something I was very afraid to do, both in that it’s something I’ve always been afraid to do in general and even more so in the specific instance in which I did it.  It did NOT go according to plan.  At all.  But, in the end, it was OK.  Better than OK, really.

And so, going forward, I’m choosing to live my life boldly in every instance I can manage it.  I think there’s a balance between throwing caution to the wind and listening to your own intuition, but I think I’ve long erred on the side of being too cautious.  In 2011, I’ll be living a little closer to the edge, I think, come what may.