Here is my great confession for 2011: I spent the summer in as severe a depression as I’ve ever been through, and I am not being dramatic when I tell you it was probably the scariest phase of my life. I couldn’t write. I couldn’t focus. I couldn’t bring myself to do any sort of workout other than running. I couldn’t go an entire day without crying. And I could not for the life of me figure out how to fix it. None of my previously successful tools were working. I had six vials of blood drawn because I had doctors run every possible test to see if there was a medical reason for my inability to get myself out of that place. And never has the news that I am in perfect health been so distressing. I’m not sure what happened to finally lift me out of it, but I suspect it was a combination of:

• a change in diet (I went gluten-free, or close to it, for several months),
• a change in perspective (“this too shall pass,” and that I cannot and should not try to control other people’s reactions, and that as long as I am doing my best in regards to right action and right speech, I can let go),
• getting the news about my script reaching the AFF semifinals,
• and eventually sheer stubbornness.

I wish I had been brave enough to reach out to more people than I did, to talk about what I was going through, but that is one of the terrible things about depression — it tricks you out of wanting the things you need most. I’m lucky; I got through it.

Even though I’m grateful to have made it over that hurdle, I was feeling pretty despondent about doing my year-end creative review since I’d had such a long dry spell.  So, it was a huge relief when I went back and actually listed everything I’d done on that front and saw it wasn’t quite as bad as I’d feared.  But the truth is I didn’t meet many of the big goals I set for myself last year.

• I didn’t query any of my scripts (though I got lucky with the Austin Film Festival picking up some of that slack for me) or my children’s story.
• I didn’t do ScriptFrenzy because I was desperately (and unsuccessfully) reworking a script to resubmit to the BlueCat Fellini Screenplay Competition.
• That script was the still-enigmatic M. Valentine. And I will break that thing one day. But this was sadly not the year (though I did get a tiny consolation when it made the quarterfinals of that competition, considering how terribly, terribly clunky I thought it was).
• I did not write a stage play.
• I didn’t quite see something I wrote produced, but I am currently post-producing something I wrote, so I’m willing to call that one a draw.

So that’s the bad.  But the rest is pretty good.

I got my house in order, or as close to it as I feel it needs to be. I no longer have a junk room (or rooms, as the case may have been), and this, my friends, is a definite win.

I hit my film-watching goals, and I read a ton of books this year, compared to usual, topping out at 34.  Highlights there, in case you’re looking for something to read:

• The Hunger Games Trilogy
• Ender’s Saga + Ender’s Shadow
• The Paris Wife
• One Day
• The Help
• The Principles of Uncertainty
• Incendiary
• Sarah’s Key
• The Night Circus
• The Invention of Hugo Cabret

I visited three new places.

Council Bluffs, Iowa: Where I got to watch and listen to the Monkees rocking it out, albeit from behind a fence, because it was unbeknownst to us a 21-and-over show, and my sister was not 21-and-over. I also got to meet my friend Matt for the first time since we made our acquaintance, what, 4 years ago? It’s always nice to find you can sit down with people you converse with all the time across the internet and have pretty much the exact same rapport when you’re sitting across a table in a smelly, grimy casino restaurant.

New Orleans, Louisiana: Where I caught an eyeful on Bourbon Street, ate All The Desserts, had my fortune told in front of St. Louis Cathedral, made friends with strangers, and listened to some fantastic jazz.  Bonus: In an amazingly serendipitous occurrence, one of my old friends from high school (whom I hadn’t seen since) happened to be passing through, and thanks to twitter, we got to sit down and catch up over some beignets & gumbo.

The woman on the right was very concerned for my emotional welfare because I was sight-seeing solo. "If you don't have any friends, you should make some! Preferably a guy!" she told me.

This street jazz band had just set up, and it was too early for the New Orleans crowds, so I asked them to play me a song, any song they liked. They chose "When You're Smilin'," and insisted on flagging down another tourist to take a picture of me with them. A perfect example of the Spirit of New Orleans.

Austin, Texas: I’ve written about my amazing experience at the Austin Film Festival here, but the thing I keep going back to is the great folks I met. I get a little thrill of delight every time an e-mail or tweet pops up from one of my fellow festival attendees. Bonus: I also got to catch up with a couple of friends who had moved away whilst there. Austin’s a great city, a place for hippies and hipsters and artists of all sorts. I’m definitely hoping to head back for the festival again next year.

After a full day of panels and films, nearing the end of the Wrap Party somewhere around 1 or 2 a.m., Jess, Jarrod, Nate, and Bleary-Eyed-Barely-Standing-Not-Used-To-This-Sort-of-Schedule Me

Me & Jess at the Paramount Theatre

There were some other pretty neat things about 2011, too.

My team won third place in a 3v3 corporate basketball tournament, which is pretty cool considering I hadn't played since my freshman year of high school & probably half of the team had never played more than recreationally, if at all, beyond this tournament. I also survived a 3v3 soccer tournament as the only bonafide soccer player, including the last few games with two players, and then me + an injured player. That was fun.

I ran in two 5Ks, and I ran three events in my first track meet ever. This picture is from the Thanksgiving 5K after my sister & I spent literally an hour trying to find my car.

We picked out bridesmaids dresses for my middle sister's wedding this coming July (they'll be black), and even more exciting, we helped my sister pick out her wedding dress. As a big sister, that's a pretty neat thing.

This is where I learned to suspend myself from a nylon ribbon attached to the ceiling thanks to an aerial acrobatics class. It is also where I came to terms with the fact that, despite considering myself a pretty athletic chick, anything that requires grace and poise just doesn't come naturally. Give me something I can throw, punch or kick, though, and I'm good!

I learned humility by losing to all of my family members at mini-golf. I may also have sent the ball careening off the green like six times. These things happen.

I learned that I do not have the patience for pottery, but I still made these, and that's kind of cool.

I survived my 10-year high school reunion.

I kissed the guy who gave me this.

And this.

I definitely flew in a tiny helicopter.

And what year could be complete without crazy hats?

As I said, the creative front wasn’t as awful as I’d feared going into the review either.

Recognitions

• 2011 CS Open Round 2 Qualifier (Top 100 Entrants from Round 1)
• 2011 BlueCat Fellini Quarterfinalist – MONSIEUR VALENTINE
• 2011 Austin Film Festival Screenplay Competition Semifinalist (Comedy Feature) – ‘TIL DEATH PARTS US

Creative Achievements

I worked on five screenplays.

• Rewrote M. VALENTINE twice.
• Polished TDPU.
• Polished MUTE.
• Wrote a draft zero of JOLENE.
• Outlined and started writing SOUNDS OF SILENCE.

I wrote seven film-related posts.

• My Most Anticipated Movies of 2011
• Ditty’s January Netflix Pick: THE STATION AGENT
• Ditty’s March Netflix Pick: TiMER
• Make It the Same, Only Different! Actually, You Know What? Screw Different.
• LARRY CROWNE: A Defense of Pleasant Films
• Splices: “Beginners” (2011)
• Ditty’s Favorite Movies of 2011

I wrote and posted 13 short pieces, and wrote at least 3.5 unposted short stories and a couple handfuls of unposted poems:

• [short fiction] Notice
• [short fiction] Frogs
• [short fiction] Contained Heart™
• [short fiction] Fire
• [short fiction] The Knight & the Dragon
• [memoir] A Valentine’s Reflection
• [memoir] This Recipe Will Change Your Life
• [memoir] Fortune #3
• [memoir] Perspective on a White Hair
• [memoir] Reunion
• [memoir] A Farewell to Borders
• [memoir] Pottery #1
• [poetry] Primitive Telemetry

I wrote three short scenes for competitions, one of which I might like to expand at some point.

I wrote a bad novel in November.

My sister and I interviewed and filmed people talking about their Valentine’s Day experiences — good, bad, funny & sweet.

And last but definitely not least, I wrote and directed a short film, STILL, which I am currently editing.

Thanks to my DP, Amy; my make-up artist, Kate; my gorgeous statue jilted bride, Meg; and my persevering, resilient human statue, Mike.

All in all, it was a really bizarrely terrible and wonderful year. I’m not sure I’ve ever had such a rollercoaster 365 days before, but I wouldn’t trade it. Here are a few things I’ve learned.

• When life gets too overwhelming, there is no better temporary escape than into a good book.
• There is nothing as resilient as the human spirit. People survive the worst horrors and still find a way to see beauty in the world. Our only responsibility is to keep trying.
• Life never gets less complicated, so there’s no use waiting ’til it does. I think the key is this: As much as you can, choose complications that bring you joy.

No Year in Review post would be complete without some goals for the coming year. I’ve got some other year-long initiatives that I might detail in a future post, but for now, here are the big goals.

• Write three spec scripts.
• Write twelve short stories/pieces.
• Participate in NaNoWriMo.
• Finish STILL and submit to festivals.
• Submit scripts to Nicholl, Austin and BlueCat.
• Visit three new and/or awesome places.
• Read 24 books.
• Watch 200 films.

FYI, I used these two fantastic guides for my own year-end review.

• For Life: Nicole is Better’s 6-Step Process, Eff Yeah List, & Goal-Setting Template for the Obsessively Type-A & 100% Crazy
• For Writing & Creative Stuff: Go Into the Story’s Writing Goals Series

That’s it! Did you guys do any sort of year-end review? Favorite moments of 2011? Things you’re most looking forward to in 2012? I’d love to hear about them!

THE BEAVER
Writer: Kyle Killen / Director: Jody Foster

This film really seems to split audiences. I don’t know if I was helped going in by the fact that I’d read the screenplay, since it was being marketed as a dark comedy instead of the drama that it is. Some have argued that the puppet concept made the profile of a man with severe depression too outlandish to be taken seriously. For me, it put enough distance between real life and fiction that I was able to connect with it like a fable — I could immerse myself in the story in ways that might have been too uncomfortable otherwise. The truth is, people with depression all cope in different ways — many times destructively. The puppet was just that — a coping mechanism. I thought the film was an accurate and heartbreaking examination of depression, not only how it affects those who suffer from the condition but also how it might affect family and friends.  For that reason, I for one am very grateful it exists.

FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS
Writers: Keith Merryman & David A. Newman and Will Gluck / Director: Will Gluck

OK, let me preface this with the fact that I am a fan of the Romantic Comedy. I fully acknowledge that most of them are less than great. I still see most of them, because I’m always hoping for the next Great One. This year’s FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS was the best traditional romantic comedy I’ve seen in a long time, and by traditional, I mean it’s not cross-genre or an indie, and it hits all the beats you’ve seen before and expect. The difference here is that this one does it whilst poking fun at itself, focusing on character and heart, and with the incredibly important benefit of great chemistry between the leads. It’s fun, it’s funny, it’s sweet, and its characters are people I care about and root for.

BRIDESMAIDS
Writer: Kristen Wiig & Annie Mumolo / Director: Paul Feig

People seem to think this movie was unique because it was an R-rated comedy featuring a cast of mainly women. What really made it unique was that it was a female-driven comedy with loads of character development and heart. The fact that it was R-rated really had nothing to do with what made BRIDESMAIDS special. Kristen Wiig turns in a delightfully cringe-worthy and surprisingly heartfelt performance,  Melissa McCarthy walks away with every scene she’s in, and Chris O’Dowd wins over not only Wiig’s Annie but the entire audience with his charming Irish brogue, dweebish sweetness & dry sense of humor. In a year filled with comedies that seemed to be more interested in raunch than anything else, this film went for heart first — and that made it the best of the bunch.

CRAZY STUPID LOVE
Writer: Dan Fogelman / Director: Glenn Ficarra, John Requa

While the ensemble isn’t as large as, say, LOVE ACTUALLY, this here is an ensemble romantic comedy that really, really works — or at least it did for me. And I’m not just saying that because of Ryan Gosling. Or Emma Stone. (But let’s face it — they’re both fantastic.)  While it veers a little wacky and even a little uncomfortably inappropriate at times, CRAZY STUPID LOVE still managed to tug my heart strings enough to make me break down in copious tears whilst sitting between two strangers in a theatre. Awkward. Seriously, though, you’ve got Steve Carrell doing what Steve Carrell does best — playing a socially awkward but totally sweet magoo.  The supporting cast is excellent, featuring Julianne Moore and Marisa Tomei.  And it has one of the best twists I saw all year — in a romantic comedy no less!  So, if you’re a fan of the genre, or of Ryan Gosling’s abs, do check this one out.

MIDNIGHT IN PARIS
Writer/Director: Woody Allen

I love Woody Allen.  I love Paris.  I love literature.  I love bohemian philosophy.  There’s pretty much no way I wasn’t going to love this film. Whimsical, dryly humorous, existential in a down-to-earth way, and sneakily hopeful… It’s what Woody Allen does best, in my opinion.

THE ARTIST
Writer/Director: Michel Hazanavicius

I knew I’d love this film from the moment I saw the trailer. A silent, black & white film about a silent film star who reaches the height of his career just as the silent film era is coming to an end, THE ARTIST is a gorgeous, clever exploration of a man’s downward spiral — and whether or not he can find redemption in a new medium and in life.  It’s fascinating watching silent film acting, as everything must be said with expressions instead of with words. As a writer, it’s a good reminder that film is first and foremost a visual medium when it’s easy to be lazy with dialog.  Show, don’t tell and all that jazz.  Another thing it forces, though, is for the audience to really look at a character.  You have a chance to become immersed in what’s happening, to fill in the silence with your own understanding, and that’s a really cool experience in this day and age. I’d love to see more silent films, to be honest, but the key (like 3D) is using it to serve the story rather than as a simple gag. THE ARTIST does it well.

THE ADJUSTMENT BUREAU
Writer/Director: George Nolfi

This movie broke my heart and then put it back together. It is also the movie I discussed most for a good six months after it came out. The chemistry between Emily Blunt and Matt Damon is electric, and it’s the romance between their characters that really makes this movie memorable more than the sci-fi/fantasy elements — though I found the philosophy behind them really interesting as well.

ANOTHER EARTH
Writer: Brit Marling, Mike Cahill / Director: Mike Cahill

This microbudget film was one of the most compelling of the year.  When another earth is discovered, a young woman who made a terrible mistake several years ago, ruining not only her life but several others, too, has a chance to see if her life on Earth 2 turned out differently.  What follows is a heart-wrenching story of the search for redemption, forgiveness, and purpose. Also worth noting, this film has my favorite last shot of a film all year long, if not in the past several years.

HUGO
Writer: John Logan / Director: Martin Scorsese

There’s no doubt that this is a film for film-lovers, but there’s so much more to HUGO than just that. If you go in expecting the fare you get from most children’s films these days — bombastic, gag-filled, superficial “entertainment” — you’ll either be disappointed or thrilled depending on how you feel about such movies. Fair warning, not all kids are going to love this movie if that’s the sort of thing they’re used to seeing. But it’s the kind of movie all kids should be growing up on, in my opinion.  In some ways, this film’s whimsy and wonder reminded me of AMÉLIE. It features rich characters and beautiful cinematography.  It is the only film where I’ve ever thought the 3D was worthwhile.  If you have the chance to see it in 3D, I highly, highly recommend it.  Even if you don’t, movies like this deserve to be seen, and I highly encourage you to do so.

BEGINNERS
Writer/Director: Mike Mills

I talked about this movie in more detail over at the No-Name Movie Blog, but here’s a quick excerpt:

“Beginnings are always hard, because in each of them, we are always cast as beginners — inexperienced, unknowing, and even fearful.  It’s entirely understandable that we want to avoid them.  The idea of having to start over is often scarier than clinging to the vestiges of something long gone by.  But it’s the beginning again (and again, and again) that really defines the act of living.

And this is the message BEGINNERS delivered to me, in its quirky and light-hearted way, at a time when I needed to hear it.  It’s a good message no matter where you are or what you’re dealing with in life, because sooner or later, things do end, and it’s nice to remember there’s magic in beginning again.”

HONORABLE MENTIONS
(in no particular order)

Jeff, Who Lives At Home
(I’m almost positive this will make my Top 10 list next year. I didn’t include it this year since it technically doesn’t come out ’til 2012. I was lucky enough to see it at the Austin Film Festival.)
Like Crazy
The Muppets
50/50
We Bought a Zoo
Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark
Attack the Block

That’s the list! I still haven’t seen a couple of contenders, like THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO and WAR HORSE, which I have a feeling will have a shot at at least being added to my honorable mentions.  What about you all? Favorite movies of 2011, GO!

© 2011 Elizabeth Ditty
Prompt words via Kathy Kottaras: water, limit, valve, electric, iron, orbit, telemetry, signal, drains, look

If you participated in Reverb10 during December of last year, are any of the things you wanted to manifest in 2011 revealing themselves?

In short, yes, but not necessarily the things I expected. (Funny how that works, innit?) It has been a rather frustrating year on the writing front so far, but I feel like I’ve experienced other aspects of life more fully than I have in a long time.  And the most important and wonderful thing I’ve learned is this:

In this life, we can live and act in fear or in passion. Fear looks like safety because it numbs us from the potential of pain — but it’s not a localized anesthetic, and so we give up the experience of exultant joy, too.  Passion, on the other hand, is dangerous.  It is filled with risk.  Every sensation is heightened.  In one moment it can feel as if your heart is being forcibly torn from your chest, and in the next it seems like it might swell to such magnitude that your body can barely contain it.  Passion is never safe, and it is always intense.

I wasn’t entirely sure I was capable of living with such intensity anymore, but it turns out the heart is incredibly resilient if we can find the courage to give it the opportunity.  If I learn nothing else all year, I am grateful I’ve been able to discover this.

RANGO
March 4
Writer: John Logan / Director: Gore Verbinski

If this film is half as fun as the behind-the-scenes featurette, I’ll be well-pleased.  It’s a fish-out-of-water story about a chameleon with dreams of being a swashbuckling hero falling into a situation where he actually has to pretend to be one.  The animation looks bright and unique, and the film feels like it has a little bit of a FIEVEL GOES WEST tone to the whole thing, which is a very good thing in my book.

PAUL
March 18
Writers: Nick Frost & Simon Pegg / Director: Greg Mottola

Honestly, if this weren’t Nick Frost & Simon Pegg, I’d probably be a lot less interested.  The premise of two British comic-book geeks finding an alien outside Area 51 strikes me in about the same way as those for HOT FUZZ and SHAUN OF THE DEAD did.  They didn’t sound particularly bad; they just didn’t really sound like something I wanted to run out and see.  And then I saw them and learned that I was crazy, because both those movies are awesome.  I’m hoping PAUL will prove much the same.

SCREAM 4
April 15
Writer: Kevin Williamson / Director: Wes Craven

The original SCREAM was one of the first horror movies to make a dent in my psyche, and it’s probably my favorite of the genre of all time because of its ability to balance satire and horror without becoming farce.  The sequels didn’t fare so well in that endeavor.  But it’s been 15 years since we first met Sydney Prescott, and there should be plenty of fresh material to mine.  Here’s hoping anyway.

WATER FOR ELEPHANTS
April 22
Writer: Richard LaGravenese / Director: Francis Lawrence

Based on Sara Gruen’s novel (which, interestingly, started out as a NaNoWriMo novel), this film looks like it’s got a bit of a BIG FISH feel to it.  The trailer suggests it’ll be a visually stunning film, and it’ll be nice to see Robert Pattinson breaking out of his TWILIGHT role with something other than indie melodrama (not to mention Christopher Waltz getting the opportunity to chew some villainous scenery again).

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES
May 20
Writers: Ted Elliott & Terry Rossio / Director: Rob Marshall

I seem to be in the minority who actually thought the third installment of the Pirates franchise was pretty decent.  That being said, it seems like they’re getting back to the simpler, adventure-story roots of the first film, with Captains Jack and Barbossa on a quest for the fountain of youth.  I’ll watch Johnny Depp in anything, and as a big fan of the franchise, I’m pretty optimistic about this one.

LARRY CROWNE
July 1
Writers: Tom Hanks & Nia Vardalos / Director: Tom Hanks

While the story itself (that of a man who loses his job and then reinvents himself by going back to college) feels fairly standard, it’s the people behind it that make this a movie I’m really looking forward to seeing.  I always love seeing Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts on screen, and this feels like a good (if potentially predictable) choice for them to do what they do best: humorous and heartwarming.

HARRY POTTER & THE DEATHLY HALLOWS: PART 2
July 15
Writer: Steve Kloves / Director: David Yates

First off, is this poster intense or what? Geez. Anyway, as a fan of both the books and movies, there’s no way this wasn’t going to be on my list.  The franchise really is nothing less than a phenomenon, and seeing how both the films and actors have grown in maturity and talent has been fascinating.  I’m almost sorry to see the franchise end, but I’m also excited to see what Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson and Rupert Grint do next.

THE MUPPETS
November 23
Writers: Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller / Director: James Bobin

The puppet rock opera in FORGETTING SARAH MARSHALL convinced me that Jason Segel was the perfect person to write the next Muppets movie. And then Hollywood read my mind, and all was well.  There’s a very MUPPETS TAKE MANHATTAN feel to this story, which centers on the Muppets’ biggest fan convincing them to come out of retirement to save their old theatre.  Feels perfect for their return to the big screen.

HUGO CABRET
December 9
Writer: John Logan / Director: Martin Scorcese

A film based on a whimsical children’s mystery novel about an orphan living inside the walls of a 1930s Paris train station is perhaps the very last project I would have guessed for Scorcese, and that makes me very excited about it.

A DANGEROUS METHOD
Writer: Christopher Hampton (play) / Director: David Cronenberg

Any reteaming of David Cronenberg and Viggo Mortensen’s going to catch my attention, and there’s no denying that Sigmund Freud is one of the more fascinating individuals in the history of the world.  I’m looking forward to seeing what they do with the story.

KILLING BONO
Writers: Ben Bond, Dick Clement, Ian La Frenais, Simon Maxwell / Director: Nick Hamm

Based on the true story of music journalist Neil McCormick, who dreamt of becoming a global rock star with his brother — problem being that they were competing directly with their schoolmates, who went on to become U2.  This film looks almost like a mash-up of ALMOST FAMOUS meets SPINAL TAP.  The costumes alone look hilarious and horrifying, and the snippets of music I’ve heard suggest this soundtrack will also get a fair amount of play on my iPod this year.  Perhaps not quite what Mr. McCormick had in mind in his youth, but having your life made into a movie (even one that’s all about taking the piss out of you) can’t be all bad.

THE WOMAN IN BLACK
Writer: Jane Goldman / Director: James Watkins

I saw the stage adaptation of Susan Hill’s novel twice this past year — once on each of my trips to London.  Having read the screenplay for the upcoming film, I can say that they are really two entirely different beasts.  While it’s not really anything like the stage play I love so much, I think the film will shape up to be a good, solid mood-spooky-horror film, in the vein of THE OTHERS or THE ORPHANAGE.

That’s it for me. What movies are you all looking forward to in 2011?

1. Read 24 books in 2010. – Done.
2. Read 24 scripts in 2010. – I managed only 12. Not so good.
3. Finish TDPU & submit to contests. – Done, and while I got no Nicholl love at all this year, ‘TIL DEATH PARTS US did make the semi-finals of the BlueCat competition this year, so I’m taking that as a small triumph.
4. ScriptFrenzy 2010. – Done.
5. NaNoWriMo 2010. – Done.
6. Visit a place I’ve never been before (preferably in Europe). – Definitely done! I returned to Paris with my sister, and I visited London twice, once with my sister and once on my own.  I also went to the beach and then to the Smoky Mountains, where my sister and I completed a 5.4-mile, moderately challenging hike (not bad for first timers!) up to Rainbow Falls.
7. Write & film [secret project]. – Well, I didn’t end up writing/filming the secret project I originally had in mind, but I wrote and filmed something else, I think I can count this as done.  As a bonus, I also started a movie podcast with my friend Matt, which isn’t something I’d ever really considered doing, but turned out to be pretty fun.
8. Write an adaptation. – This didn’t make it onto the agenda, sadly.
9. Keep up with FridayFlash/short stories. – I only did 8 true #fridayflash stories this year, and I wrote a few travel/memoir pieces. Not quite the output I had in mind, but I’m relatively pleased with the pieces I did write.
10. Watch 200 movies. – I very nearly made this, with my count currently sitting at 191, not including repeated viewings. This also includes a few seasons of various television shows, so I’m certainly not going to complain about my media intake this year.

I kept one big goal to myself at the beginning of 2010, and that was my health/fitness efforts.  I’ve since posted a little about my journey and made mention of it several times in my #reverb10 posts.  In total this year, I lost about 65 pounds.  I hit my original goal weight, and I’m wearing smaller clothes than I wore in high school.  I’m not quite where I want to be, but I’m close enough that people look at me like I’m crazy when I say that.  In addition to the weight loss success, I also ran my first 5K race on Thanksgiving, tried/survived/came to love hot yoga, and in general got to a fitness level where I can show up grown men at the gym on a fairly regular basis.

Lessons Learned: Honestly, it was a rough year for me creatively speaking.  After churning out story after story in 2008 & 2009, I think maybe my brain just needed to take it at an easier pace.  I also was obviously devoting a lot of time and energy to the whole health/fitness thing.  Contest season put me in a bit of a roller-coaster state of mind, but NaNoWriMo helped get me back on track with my daily writing habit.  After my birthday trip to London, I felt creatively refreshed and ready to get back to work, and I hit the ground running the day after I got back.

I think I’ve covered a lot of what else I’ve learned this year in my #reverb10 posts, so, if you’re interested, here’s a round-up for your perusal.

• Dec. 1: One Word – In which I peg 2010 as Reinvention and predict Manifest for 2011.
• Dec. 2, 5, 6, 7: Writing, Let Go, Make, Community – In which I talk about how I design my life to support my writing, mention that I stopped spending unnecessary and unwarranted emotional energy, try to remember what I made this year (stories, short film, food), and wax poetic about my love for twitter and give a shout out to SparkPeople.
• Dec. 3, 4, 8: Moment, Wonder, Beautifully Different – In which I admit to my ridiculous but needed sobfest brought on by Child’s Pose, discuss the benefits of expanding one’s gaze beyond the ordinary or comfortable, and pinpoint a few ways in which I try to light people up.
• Dec. 9: Party – In which I almost pass out thanks to a corset.
• Dec. 10: Wisdom – In which my friends try and fail to help me figure out how I’ve been wise this year.
• Dec. 11 & 12: 11 Things & Body Integration – In which I name 11 things I want more of in 2011 and talk about the mind-body connection I get through fitness and how it translates to other areas of my life.
• Dec. 13: Action – In which I get on my soapbox and encourage people to do instead of talk.
• Dec. 14 & 15: Appreciate & Five Minutes – In which I talk about our ability to add or subtract joy through small actions and recount in snapshots of words & photos the things I’d most want to remember about 2011.
• Dec. 16 & 17: Friendship & Lesson Learned – In which I encourage everyone to chill out so we can appreciate and learn from one another, and where I talk about how I should leave the scripting for my scripts instead of my life.
• Dec. 18 & 19: Try & Healing – In which I talk about wanting to get back to my habit of trying out-of-the-ordinary things (like fencing, horseback riding, and aerial acrobatics, and where I quickly talk about how hot yoga has helped me with body image distortion.
• Dec. 20: Beyond Avoidance – In which I make excuses for not cleaning my house.
• Dec. 21: Future Self – In which I end up feeling very schizophrenic by writing three letters to/from three different versions of myself.
• Dec. 22, 23, 24: Travel, New Name, Everything’s OK – In which I recount my various trips, create a few personas/aliases that might be fun to use some day, and refuse to tell the story about how I learned that sometimes foolish things are worth doing.
• Dec. 25, 26, 27, 28: Photo, Soul Food, Ordinary Joy, Achieve – In which I repost a photo of myself in a silly hat and talk about why it’s my favorite of the year, link to my post about French pastries, decide I should sit on the sofa & read more often, and tell people to wait for my year-end recap (which just so happens to be this very post!).
• Dec. 29, 30, 31: Defining Moment, Gift, Core Story – In which I talk about my short film screening, the gift of having great friends & receiving grace & kindness from strangers, and stealing my life mantra from ELIZABETHTOWN.

And last but not least, here are my goals for next year.

1. Query TDPU.
2. Query the children’s story/poem/thing I wrote in 2009 (which includes the task of finding something more clever to call it instead of “story/poem/thing” in case publishers do not find humor in me Pippining at them).
3. Finish M. Valentine screenplay.
4. Visit 3 places I’ve never been before.
5. ScriptFrenzy.
6. NaNoWriMo.
7. Write a stage play.
8. See something I’ve written produced in some way, shape or form.
9. Watch 200 films.
10. Bonus: Get & keep house in order.

I think that covers it.  2010 really did end up being a pretty awesome year, and I’ve got a feeling 2011 might be feeling a little competitive. Here’s hoping each and every one of you has found some joy and laughter in 2010 and that you find exponentially more in 2011!

Dec. 29: Defining moment: Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year. (Author: Kathryn Fitzmaurice)

This year feels like it’s been full of defining moments. I covered a lot of them in my Dec. 15 post. One thing I didn’t cover was the actual screening of my short film.  That was one of the more nerve-wracking things I’ve ever done.  E-mailing someone a script to read in the privacy of their own lives is one thing. Watching a group of nearly 20 of your friends, family and acquaintances take in and react to something you’ve created from scratch is something altogether different. Thankfully, everyone either enjoyed the film or did a decent enough job pretending they enjoyed it that I didn’t feel the need to crawl under a rock and die afterwards.  Quite the contrary, once I’d gotten over the emotional hurdle of actually showing the film, it was nice to have had the opportunity to share something with people I care about.

Dec. 30: Gift: This month, gifts and gift-giving can seem inescapable. What’s the most memorable gift, tangible or emotional, you received this year? (Author: Holly Root)

I’ve been blessed time and time again this year, so it’s hard to narrow it down to just one thing.  I’m incredibly grateful for all the people who have taken the time to support me in various endeavors, whether it’s been reading scripts and giving feedback, offering an ear when I needed to vent, or even just providing a distraction when I needed to escape some aspect of my life for a bit. I’ve been amazed by the kindness of strangers over and over again this year, and to those who have been so gracious with my heart and ego, I cannot thank you enough.

Dec. 31: Core story: What central story is at the core of you, and how do you share it with the world? (Bonus: Consider your reflections from this month. Look through them to discover a thread you may not have noticed until today.) (Author: Molly O’Neill)

There’s one word I’ve returned to over and over again over the past several years, as I’ve struggled and striven and failed and succeeded at any number of things.  It’s part of a mantra I’ve stolen from one of my favorite movies, which I refuse to define as a guilty pleasure: ELIZABETHTOWN.

“We are intrepid.  We carry on.”

It’s a word that means “resolutely fearless, bold, courageous.”  It’s a definition that strikes me as a call to refuse to acknowledge fear.  It may be there in the recesses of the mind; it may be trying to work its way to the forefront.  But we can stubbornly refuse it entry into our actions and motivations.

For a long time, I operated out of fear: fear of what people would think, fear of not living up to my own expectations, fear of regret, fear that I wasn’t strong enough to bear whatever trials were to come.

But then I came across a profound statement in the writings of Thich Nhat Hanh.  I don’t remember the exact words, but, in essence, he said that fear is imagining yourself in a set of circumstances that don’t exist. I don’t know about you, but that seems like a poor use of the power of the mind.  I’d rather focus on the here and now, what I have and what I can do to make the most of the present moment.

So, since the discovery of that principle, I’ve tried to make my core story one of being intrepid.  And I’ve got to tell you, it’s really worked out pretty well.  Have a fallen on my face a few times? Of course. But that’s going to happen no matter what.  That’s when the second part of the mantra comes in handy.  You get up, brush off the grit, have a laugh at yourself, and carry on.

INCEPTION
Writer/Director: Christopher Nolan

While this film left a lot of people amazed but feeling cold, I think a compelling case could be made that this is really an epic love story wrapped up in an incredibly ambitious storytelling device that sometimes works and sometimes just makes you say, “What the hell?”  Frankly, the rotating room fight scene with Joseph Gordon-Levitt is worth the price of admission alone.  I won’t go on at length here, as I think this film has practically been talked to death and I don’t want to give anything away for folks who haven’t seen it yet, but I don’t think anyone can deny it’s a landmark film.

SHUTTER ISLAND
Writer: Laeta Kalogridis / Director: Martin Scorcese

This is another film you can’t really talk much about without giving too much away.  Suffice to say, the performances were great, as expected from Leonardo Dicaprio and the perhaps under-appreciated Mark Ruffalo; the direction was excellent, never revealing too much but never letting the audience get more lost than they should have been; and the ending, in my opinion, was absolutely perfect.

THE SOCIAL NETWORK
Writer: Aaron Sorkin / Director: David Fincher

Seeing the evolution of a tool that has become so ubiquitous in our everyday lives was always bound to be interesting.  Jesse Eisenberg portrays Mark Zuckerberg in such a fashion that you never really know if he’s an asshole, just incredibly socially inept, or perhaps borderline autistic — all while inspiring some sympathy, mind you.  No small feat.  Justin Timberlake is appropriately slimy, but also with an impressive handle on the brink-of-sanity aspects of Sean Parker’s personality in the movie.  And I wanted to reach into the screen and give Eduardo a big hug the entire film, which made me incredibly interested to see what Andrew Garfield does with Spider-Man.  The framing of the story inside the two depositions was a particularly intelligent way to tell the tale, as it allowed us to see the emotional effects of the events down the road essentially as they were happening on screen.  With a writer like Aaron Sorkin, great writing isn’t much of a surprise, though.

TOY STORY 3
Writer: Michael Arndt / Director: Lee Unkrich

I’m admittedly a bit of a crier when it comes to television and movies. I routinely find myself dehydrating on a weekly basis thanks to Glee, The Biggest Loser, Modern Family, or even Chuck or Community. It just happens. I’ve given up feeling ashamed and invested in waterproof mascara.  I own it.  Despite that, I was feeling a bit silly because I was literally sobbing my poor little childlike heart out during this movie — until I realized that 90 percent of the theatre was just as torn up as I was.  I think we all felt a bit ridiculous, but I think we all also probably went home afterward and found our old favorite toys, the ones with which we’ve never quite been able to part, and hugged them to bits.  And any film that grab that many people in such an intense way deserves a place in the top films of the year.

THE KING’S SPEECH
Writer: David Seidler / Director: Tom Hooper

There a number of elements that will always get me to a movie theatre.  One of them is Colin Firth.  Another is the non-sports-related underdog historical drama genre (see FROST/NIXON, for example).  And Geoffrey Rush will at least get me to look a movie’s way.  So, this movie had a lot going for it to begin with, but that also means it’s saddled with high expectations.  I put my go-see-this-non-mainstream-movie-with-me credibility on the line by convincing my family to see it on Christmas Day, and I was thrilled that the movie lived up not only to my own expectations but that my family enjoyed it, too.  Even my dad, who falls asleep at nearly every movie he sees, stayed awake the entire film — which I think is saying a lot for a historical drama.  The performances, as you’ve likely heard and would likely expect from the calibre of actors involved, are fantastic.  The cinematography was interesting for a movie like this: the angles were just a little off-kilter, a little uncomfortable, as if to mirror what King George must have been feeling.  The story itself is a rather amazing one, and it felt honestly told, not too sugary.  At the end, you feel the triumph, but also the weight of what is yet to be endured.  I’m hoping this film will be well-rewarded during the awards season.

BLACK SWAN
Writers: Mark Heyman and Andres Heinz and John J. McLaughlin / Director: Darren Aronofsky

Half psychological horror, half meditation on the line between artistic passion and insanity, this dark film ended up one of my favorite films of the year.  It’s a bold film, trippy and sometimes difficult to watch. It’s really hard to sum up how I feel about it, to be honest.  I was utterly compelled in moments by Natalie Portman’s portrayal of Nina Sayers.  I found myself both captivated by and feeling intensely uncomfortable about Lily, portrayed by Mila Kunis.  And I was equally drawn to and disgusted by Vincent Cassel’s Thomas Leroy, director of the ballet troupe.  This is a movie that’s not going to hit for everyone, but when it does hit, it knocks the wind out of you.

TANGLED
Writer: Dan Fogelman / Directors: Nathan Greno, Byron Howard

Finally, Disney returns to form with a cheeky, romantic, gorgeous and musically memorable film to join its animated classics.  TANGLED had echoes of some of my favorite Disney films, like THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME , SLEEPING BEAUTY, and CINDERELLA, but they all feel natural and original in this reimagining of Rapunzel.  It also has a bit of the feel of films like STARDUST and THE PRINCESS BRIDE.  The voice acting is pitch perfect.  The part of Flynn Rider feels like it was written for Zachary Levi, and Donna Murphy is fantastic as Mother Gothel.  Really, I can’t recommend this film highly enough, for anyone of any age.

AND THE REST…

It was going to be too difficult to expand my list to 10 or narrow it from about 17, so I said, “This is my list! Damn the man! Save the Empire!”  The following 10 movies are films that didn’t quite measure up to the seven above in one aspect or another (either critically or on enjoyability) but are still worth your time.

HOW TO TRAIN YOUR DRAGON: It was a strong year for animation; in another year, this might have made my Top 10.  It’s from the same folks who did LILO & STITCH, one of my favorite Disney movies of all time, and they deliver another movie with the same sort of quirkiness, darkness and heart that made that film so great.

KNIGHT & DAY: You need to go into this movie knowing it’s a farce.  They’re poking fun at the action and romantic comedy genres, and Tom Cruise is poking fun at himself.  The film plays it straight, which makes it a kooky, super fun, summer popcorn movie.

FLIPPED: Sort of like The Wonder Years but not so depressing. While some critics took issue with the he said/she said storytelling device, I found it was used in a fresh manner int hat it did a nice job sparing the audience redundancies.

IT’S KIND OF A FUNNY STORY: A sweet coming-of-age story about a kid who checks himself into a mental hospital.  The real stand-out in this movie is Zach Galifiankis, who shows that he’s not just a goon making a career on his ability to be awkward.  He acts in this movie, and he does it brilliantly.

THE TOWN: A gritty crime thriller with heart, with solid performances from the entire cast.

MORNING GLORY: I’m a sucker for journalism movies thanks to my education.  Add the always-delightful-to-watch Rachel McAdams, and you’d have to do something really wrong to make me dislike something like this film.  Luckily, the filmmakers did not try to make me dislike it; quite the opposite.  The characters walk the balance between caricature and complete human being.  It’s sweet; it’s funny; it’s feel-good.  And that’s generally good enough for me.

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS – PART ONE: More brooding character piece than we’ve seen before in the series, I found this to be one of the most interesting of the series.  It’s lovely to see how the trio of actors have really come into their own; they handle this heavy material very well.  Also worth noting, the animated sequence used to tell the story of the Deathly Hallows is absolutely brilliant.

THE CHRONICLES OF NARNIA: THE VOYAGE OF THE DAWN TREADER: I’m on the fence as to whether this trumps PRINCE CASPIAN as my favorite Narnia film.  It’s certainly the most beautiful of the three, and I think it does a nice job of re-capturing some of the magical elements of the first one while embracing the maturity of the second.  I was incredibly impressed by Georgie Hensley, who plays Lucy.  Not only is she growing up into a lovely young woman, but she showcased her growing acting talent here as well.

127 HOURS: Danny Boyle always delivers interesting movies, and Simon Beaufoy is one of my favorite screenwriters, as he knows make the heart of a character evident to the audience.  And with this incredibly challenged premise, they once again deliver.

THE TOURIST: I found this to be a highly enjoyable comedic thriller in the vein of CHARADE, though admittedly not as good as CHARADE (but what is?).  Like KNIGHT & DAY, it’s a movie that plays it straight on the surface but isn’t taking itself seriously at all underneath.  Go in, turn off your brain, and just enjoy the ride (and Johnny Depp… and Angelina Jolie).

That sums it up. What were your favorite movies of 2010?

Dec. 25: Photo: Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you. (Author: Tracey Clark)

I don’t have a lot of pics of me from this year outside of profile pics, forced family photos (I love you, Mom!) and some random shots my sister took of me in Europe, mostly when I wasn’t looking.  But I do have this one picture, which I love, and which I already shared, but here it is again.  My mom took it during our annual pre-Christmas trip to Crown Center (to shop, eat fudge, and take goofy pictures in front of the Victoria’s Secret windows).

My expression in the photo below says exactly this: “I know this is totally dorky, and I’m a little embarrassed, but it’s also totally fun, so I’m just going to go with it, and you guys are coming along with me for the ride!”

So, here’s what I’d like this picture to represent.

• I love to laugh.
• I like to spread joy whenever I can.
• I choose my actions with a priority on the potential for laughter and/or joy rather than on sparing myself embarrassment or failure.

Dec. 26: Soul Food: What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul? (Author: Elise Marie Collins)

For this prompt, I’ll simply point you to my love letter to French pastries. Can’t say it better than I did there.

Dec. 27: Ordinary Joy: Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year? (Author: Brené Brown)

Sitting on a sofa and reading a book.  I often keep myself in a near-constant state of motion, either physical or mental, so taking an hour to simply sit and disappear into another world is something that feels incredibly indulgent and wonderful.  It’s something I should probably do a lot more often.

Dec. 28: Achieve: What’s the thing you most want to achieve next year? How do you imagine you’ll feel when you get it? Free? Happy? Complete? Blissful? Write that feeling down. Then, brainstorm 10 things you can do, or 10 new thoughts you can think, in order to experience that feeling today. (Author: Tara Sophia Mohr)

I’m going to have to skip this one, as I’ll cover it in detail in my annual Year-End Recap to come later this week.  As for brainstorming what to do or think in order to experience satisfaction today? I like to do something every day to work toward my goals.  It gives me a taste of the satisfaction that comes with finishing, and it spurs me onward.

Dec. 22: Travel: How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt)

• I went jogging on a beach in Florida.
• I went hiking in the Smokies in Tennessee.
• I protected my sister from some creepy dudes in London.
• I ate my weight in pastries in Paris.
• I celebrated my golden birthday on my own in London.

Not bad for a year’s travel.  Next year, as I’ve said, I intend to do more travelling. Definitely to New York.  Probably back to Florida (as that’s what my family does).  Maybe even back to Europe.

Dec. 23: New Name: Let’s meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why? (Author: Becca Wilcott)

I’m quite good with my current name, to be honest.  But for the sake of the prompt, let’s say I was pretending to be someone else entirely for a day.  Here are a few options:

• French Tourist: Juliette (Trivia: This is the name I chose in my seventh grade French class.)
• Southern Belle in the Big City: Annie Mae
• Cool British Vixen: Vera
• Adventurous Aussie: Janie

That should do it. And as a bonus, I’ve saved myself some trouble if any of these ladies ever pop up in something I write.

Dec. 24: Everything’s OK: What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead? (Author: Kate Inglis)

Please excuse me being entirely vague here, but there are some stories that simply aren’t meant to be posted for the entire world to see.  What I will say is this: I did something I was very afraid to do, both in that it’s something I’ve always been afraid to do in general and even more so in the specific instance in which I did it.  It did NOT go according to plan.  At all.  But, in the end, it was OK.  Better than OK, really.

And so, going forward, I’m choosing to live my life boldly in every instance I can manage it.  I think there’s a balance between throwing caution to the wind and listening to your own intuition, but I think I’ve long erred on the side of being too cautious.  In 2011, I’ll be living a little closer to the edge, I think, come what may.